Our Family’s Sugar Bowl

A green sugar bowl sat unimposingly on the table. Its purpose was to make life better by offering up the sweetness needed for a cup of coffee … a bowl of cereal … or a bit of fruit.  It wasn’t all that attractive. It was plain and unadorned. But to me, our family’s sugar bowl’s value is far greater than any other piece of china I own.

This sugar bowl sat on our family’s kitchen table for as long as I can remember. The table coverings changed from Country Check to Simple Linen. The kitchen table even changed from chrome and flecked laminate to a much more civilized walnut. But it wasn’t the style or the material that the sugar bowl rested upon that was so special. It was the conversations that were held over that vessel of sweetness that remain with me … the memories of how life changed and how those experiences happened around that simple piece of shaped glass.

 

Events that Shaped My Life

• Like the time my dad asked me, a four-year-old, to sit in his lap on Saturday morning. He wanted to tell me that life just wasn’t working out between him and Mom; that he was going to live somewhere else. While I sat there, summoning up my few years of maturity, I remember how I sobbed into his shoulder while I asked if he would ever come back to visit me. Then, through his own tears, he pulled me close. I still remember him wiping away tears from his eyes as he said he changed his mind. He wasn’t going anywhere.

• Then there were all the times when I would sit at the table that held the sugar bowl, waiting for Dad to come home from working his job at the factory. He’d pour a cup almost full of milk then add a splash of coffee and spoonsful of sugar from that bowl so we could share our special coffee and talk about Life. No topics were off-limits for us. Several times I remember him taking off his glasses, rubbing his eyes, and tell me that life would be difficult for me. I seemed to have the knack of not seeing life as black and white … but I saw life’s experiences in shades of gray.

• Or the many times when Mom moved the sugar bowl aside so she could make dozens of fruit pies, apple dumplings, or cookies. She would expertly reach her spoon into the white sugar to sprinkle glistening crystals atop each piece of homemade heaven.

• Sadly, the day came when our family’s sugar bowl and a strong cup of coffee occupied that maple table when Dad told me that he and Mom were, in fact, splitting this time and I needed to pick who I would stay with. I remember the pain from that conversation and how no amount of sweetness offered up from that sugar bowl could console me.

Years later after Dad died, I remember bringing our family’s sugar bowl home with me so it could sit on my own table. And it would once again be present with life’s pain came in shades of gray, just as Dad had warned.

 

Real Sweetness

For too many years my view of Christ was just like that of my sugar bowl. While I looked the other way, turning to resentment and cynicism to help me in life, he was always there witnessing all the good as well as bad that was happening in my life. Faithfully, he offered up a sweetness for my broken spirit whenever it held bitterness; all I needed to do was accept it. He was ever-patient, offering comfort from the unpleasantness that comes with life.

John 10:10 shares, “… I came so they can have real and eternal life, more and better life than they ever dreamed of.”

Now that is what I call a real sweetness.

That sugar bowl is still in my home, but now in a place of honor and safety. It reminds me that no matter what happens, life’s bitterness can be dealt with properly with a filling of the sweetness that comes from a relationship with Christ.

 

What About You?

Is there something you brought from your childhood that gives you a sense of who you are and where you came from? It may be as simple as our family’s sugar bowl or it may be something else. Don’t be afraid to embrace the memories that shaped you into who you are. And never forget, no matter how many experiences you remember, also remember you’re a child of The King.

Struggling to find good in your life? Check out my award-winning book, God’s Best During Your Worst, or check out any of my other books on my Book page.