Have you ever wondered if God cries?
To help me understand what’s involved with having a personal relationship with God, I try to see Him as I see others with whom I have relationships. I mean no disrespect by this. I bring Him down to my level—figuratively, of course—so I can look into His eyes and try to understand who He is to me.
That’s how I started the morning of April 1, 2011. It was Friday and I thanked God for bringing me through another work week. Little did I know while I was thanking God, He was sitting on the edge of his bed, elbows on his knees with his head in his hands. He knew when he got out of bed that day everything would start falling into motion. He choose to stay on the edge of his bed—just a few moments more. He knew this day had to come. He knew before I went to sleet that night I would hear news that had the potential to rock me to the core of my foundation. He knew today would be the beginning of my need to revisit my personal hell and the demons He had banished from my life year earlier.
As He finally got out of bed and strolled to His kitchen, He knew this wasn’t how He planned to do things. This had never been how He planned it. Sin had gotten in the way all those years ago. His children were all paying the costs and He was cleaning up after it—still cleaning up.
As he poured Himself a cup of coffee and fixed His cereal, He felt the pain I would experience later on that day. With each spoonful of cereal, He pondered on what was to come. He stopped, put his spoon down and rested His arm and forehead on the table.
I wonder if God cried for me that day.
These are some of the thoughts that careened through my mind the early part of April 2011. I write about that and more in my new memoir, “Ten Days to Live: How God Used a Brain Tumor to Heal a Heart.”
Watch for it!