Facebook Dilemma

Why is Facebook so popular? I must say, I’m a bit distracted by it all. I get to speak to family and friends, see pictures of them and their children, and continue our bonds of friendship over the miles. I find myself continually checking to see how statuses change.  But the other day I had a troubling experience concerning Facebook. I saw a person from high school out there … one of the “popular girls” … and I was so excited to connect with her. I was ready “Friend” her; to tell her all about what I’ve been doing over the years since our paths crossed ever-so-slightly during high school.  I was so excited to be able to share all my high points of my life … how I’d found meaning beyond the hallways of high school.

As I began writing a note to her on the “Add a Friend” link I found myself acting desperate; just like one of the Unpopular kids trying to get to the Popular kids’ lunch table. I heard my tone  say, “I’m somebody now. Do you want to like me now?”

Pathetic; just pathetic.

I stopped writing, sat back in my chair, and cancelled my friending request to her. What was I doing? I am very happy where I am in life. I have more peace now than I did in high school, so why was I trying to impress one of the cool kids all these years later? Here I was, trying to prove something to someone who probably hasn’t thought of me in over 30 years. And then the thoughts weren’t that deep. It isn’t that this girl from high school was a mean girl … we just didn’t travel in the same circles.

So again let me ask, “Why is Facebook so popular?”  For me, I need to make sure to use it for a specific job… keeping up with people I love. If I use if for anything other than that I open myself up to problems and heartache. I don’t concern myself with the Popular table at lunchtime. I sit where it feels best to me … with people who love me for who I am.

I like this much better.

2 thoughts on “Facebook Dilemma

  1. Robin,
    Funny you should write that… I started out on Facebook like a kid with a new toy. I wanted to explore all of the “friending” (a new word actually created by Facebook users), abilities – including talking to the close friends/family that I never seem to have enough time to have face-to-face time with, and finding all those people that I haven’t talked to in ages.
    The honeymoon lasted for a few months – I was spending lots of time on Facebook every day, trying to comment on every status change or post and answering messages. I actually found people from high school that I hadn’t talked to for 30+ years. Then there were the games… OHhhh! the games….lots of time wasted there!
    At some point, I wasn’t able to answer all of the things posted to me. There was just not enough time in the day! Then the chat thingy kept coming up when I was I the middle of writing to someone else – or actually talking to a person face-to-face or on the phone.
    I started categorizing my 100+ “friends” into people I would answer right away, people that could wait till I wasn’t so busy, and people I just couldn’t handle any more.
    Then it got down to people I had to talk to or they would call me on the phone – i.e. my kids – and people I couldn’t take time to answer.
    Finally I just started loggin on to Facebook once a week – browsing some status lines, and deleting all the messages without reading them.
    It hit me that all this “social networking” was a huge commitment, and for my own mental health, I needed to figure out what I was going to do.
    I have resolved to log on to Facebook a couple times a week, look at status lines and choose a different person to talk to each time, so I get the “latest” from the workd outside my “home-work-church” coccoon.
    And to answer as many of my messages as possible, with no more than 200 words (oops – I guess this violated that rule
    Of course you know how resolutions usually go…
    Tune in for more in a month or so.
    Much love and grace to you!
    John White

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  2. Well I have sold a car on Facebook 🙂 Who knew?? I like facebook…but it is just like anything else…BALANCE…I have my coffee in the morning while on facebook…that’s it…It is fun to see what people are doing for the day…new additions to families…wedding pics…scriptures posted…etc…just like anything else, it can be a good thing or a bad thing…I use it as a good thing 🙂

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